also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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