foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Randomize
