Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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