Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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