All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize