idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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