I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
