Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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