I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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