i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
