I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
We are two peas in an std pod
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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