I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Randomize