I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
