So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
