dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
