Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
