We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
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