new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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