If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
