better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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