He is such a slut. More and more my type.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
