Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Randomize
