You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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