So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
