i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
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