The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
