Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
