one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
