Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
pop tarts are not kleenex
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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