Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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