god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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