the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
