I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
