My brain says no but my pants say off.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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