Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
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