No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
