Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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