I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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