i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
