just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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