I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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