I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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