Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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