Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Randomize
