I think I just saw someone hide a body.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
time to smoke my breakfast
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize