Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
