Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Randomize
