You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Randomize
