idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
We have started to decorate penises.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
