Tell her she can't have a vagina
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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