Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
