Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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